devilman145

I got a wordpress blog. Seems like all the cocky English types are on there.

My turn, I guess.

rollerdiscoofdoom.wordpress.com

Things I need to do soon

 

Improve my social life
Go on a vacation
Lower my credit card bill
Curb my love for shopping
Improve myself
Get an editorial job in Vegas so I can get one in New York or LA

Now I need to take a shower then

Lets do this

The subject line was in my head and I wanted to jot it down before I went to bed. Sleep is for the weak they say, but life is draining and taxing.
Filling my days with the dread that is school, I think of what's next.

Wasting time, nothing to do, should be studying, but that never works out.

I like reading futurist stuff. it's crazy, but hopeful. The world is in shambles and yet we all look for answers. Why can't we come together to move forward instead of allying against each other? Is it really ego and pride? Before there were humans, there was just the Earth by itself. No boundaries, territories, air spaces, or laws. Is it so hard to hope that we could advance beyond our petty existences and move forward? 

I dream too much, but this is a dream I hope I'll get to see.

The library was packed tonight to see Neil Gaiman talk. An overall great experience mired by the two douchebags. It's funny how you think being away from it so long, things could change; and yet they stay the same.

Guy with glasses number 1 who brought his baby with him and bitched to me about it being trampled. Yikes

Weird guy with glasses who was all up with me because we were taking the sign that no one claimed as everyone was leaving. Yawn

Seriously, it's like a parallel world where for every one pain patron, there is a pain library employee/someone associated with it.

Anyways, meeting Neil Gaiman was a treat. Definitely incredible.

It's so weird. I got back into comics full throttle and now I'm afraid that they're losing their luster. Out of the 15 I get, about 5 are actually speaking to me .Yikes.

Also, does anyone find it sad that the human species has yet to produce a Hank Pym, Tony Stark, Reed Richards, etc? I'd say Stephen Hawking is the closest living being we have to Reed Richards and that's great, but we have such a far way to go. I know that reality can't be exciting as comics in the simplification of science, but man we need a Fantastic 4 in this age.


As for other stuff, I have a big pile of trades/graphic novels waiting for me. Like I told Katrina, I've lost the motivation to read a majority of them. It'll be nice one day to have them for future reading, I guess. Space is an issue, but that's not of concern.

This journal really has no point, but it's fun to type nonetheless. Is that a real word ? 

Someone asked me what comics they'd recommend after reading Watchmen. A lot of people go straight to the Vertigo books, which is interesting because Watchmen isn't a Vertigo title. If comics greatest comic can achieve such status outside of a mature readers line, why can't others? I look at stuff such as Batman RIP and wonder how it could possibly be a DCU title. Sure Morrison plays the story well enough off camera in order to walk around controversial barriers, but his prose piece was a complete mind fuck of disturbing Joker images.

As for the point of the last paragraph, I thought long and hard about what comics might actually carry on the mantle of Watchmen. My thoughts came to DC : The New Frontier and JSA:The Golden Age. Both of these titles take the established universe and spin a tale that greatly changes our perceptions of what it is to be a super-hero. The JSA are always the moral standard by which all heroes operate, while the new frontier is able to use history as a method of not only introducing modern readers into the world of the silver age, but to also show the evolution of a nation. Where the Watchmen universe featured the 1980s and the race to win the Cold War, both the Golden Age and New Frontier use the costumed hero as a way to expand not only their universe, but also the way in which we perceive our own reality.

That made no sense, but I promise if you talked to me in person I could explain it much better.

I love crime and noir, yet I haven't dedicated as much time as I should have.

I also fear for the science world if McCain and nut-job Palin get elected. Whether or not he'll turn on his views is one thing, but to give her any power is scarey.

Comics are great, yet I'm afraid about getting burnt out again. Yikes

Life is so fun right now. I'm up to my ass in school work. I barely have time to go out. I'm glad that I'll get to see David a bit before he leaves. I'm stressed and many times it feels like people just don't get it.

The Human experience sucks.

1. Something From The ACME Novelty Library
2. A Complete Run Of Arcade
3. Any Number Of Mini-Comics
4. At Least One Pogo Book From The 1950s
5. A Barnaby Collection
6. Binky Brown and the Holy Virgin Mary
7. As Many Issues of RAW as You Can Place Your Hands On
8. A Little Stack of Archie Comics
9. A Suite of Modern Literary Graphic Novels
10. Several Tintin Albums
11. A Smattering Of Treasury Editions Or Similarly Oversized Books
12. Several Significant Runs of Alternative Comic Book Series
13. A Few Early Comic Strip Collections To Your Taste
14. Several “Indy Comics” From Their Heyday
15. At Least One Comic Book From When You First Started Reading Comic Books
16. At Least One Comic That Failed to Finish The Way It Planned To
17. Some Osamu Tezuka
18. The Entire Run Of At Least One Manga Series
19. One Or Two 1970s Doonesbury Collections
20. At Least One Saul Steinberg Hardcover
21. One Run of A Comic Strip That You Yourself Have Clipped
22. A Selection of Comics That Interest You That You Can’t Explain To Anyone Else
23. At Least One Woodcut Novel
24. As Much Peanuts As You Can Stand
25. Maus
26. A Significant Sample of R. Crumb’s Sketchbooks
27. The original edition of Sick, Sick, Sick.
28. The Smithsonian Collection Of Newspaper Comics
29. Several copies of MAD
30. A stack of Jack Kirby 1970s Comic Books
31. More than a few Stan Lee/Jack Kirby 1960s Marvel Comic Books
32. A You’re-Too-High-To-Tell Amount of Underground Comix
33. Some Calvin and Hobbes
34. Some Love and Rockets
35. The Marvel Benefit Issue Of Coober Skeber
36. A Few Comics Not In Your Native Tongue
37. A Nice Stack of Jack Chick Comics
38. A Stack of Comics You Can Hand To Anybody’s Kid
39. At Least A Few Alan Moore Comics
40. A Comic You Made Yourself
41. A Few Comics About Comics
42. A Run Of Yummy Fur
43. Some Frank Miller Comics
44. Several Lee/Ditko/Romita Amazing Spider-Man Comic Books
45. A Few Great Comics Short Stories
46. A Tijuana Bible
47. Some Weirdo
48. An Array Of Comics In Various Non-Superhero Genres
49. An Editorial Cartoonist’s Collection or Two
50. A Few Collections From New Yorker Cartoonists

I guess I'm not up to Spurgeon level yet :(

I suck at maintaining these things and yet i like to change journals from time to time. Anyways, I feel uneasy right now. Not sad or anything, just tense and fidgety. Maybe I'll get through all these Daredevil comics and that'll make things better.

I also really want to play a videogame, but my work has been suffering in the sense that I haven't done much work.

Oh well, bed time and job tomorrow.

Later

I need to find focus in my life. I don't know where I'm going and I think that's causing me to burden myself and freak out. I'm tired of these panic attacks and bouts with crying. I'm an adult and I need to get a grip on my life.

My stomach hurts and now I need to get insurance. That's the next goal is to secure myself for the time being.

Staring at the ceiling, he can't find his dream. Where did it go so long ago? Is he lost forever? The dream, he waits for it to find him, but fear is all he sees.

When will he find his sleep,
It's what he needs more than anything,
If only it would come to him instead of haunting his presence

It's sleep I need, where has it gone.
I only want to dream again and not be afraid.

Lately it has been hard to keep a grip on things. I feel weird all the time, even though I'm okay. Just this awkward feeling and I haven't been able to stop it; and nothing seems to take my mind off the feeling.

What the hell is going on with me? I don't know, but it's not really enjoyable as of late, even though it is.

Lets hope tomorrow brings less awkwardness.

God I want to move to New York. I feel like this city is holding me back. Even the president of DC said you should move to New York if you want to get into publishing. Gah!

Anyways, I've applied for two more positions (like you really cared).

1. Assistant Editor for a Syndicate. Basically I'd be looking over comic strips which seems like fun.
2. I've also applied for a trade manager position with DC. I'd love to go to cons and run the show, it sounds like fun.

God I should just hire a bunch of artists and start writing, but I hate writing some times. O' woe is me.

This summer has seen me move forward and backward and all over the place. I feel like my mind wants to give up on me now at a regular once a week schedule.

And yet somehow, I'm dealing. Life is hard, and sometimes I whine too much. But now, things are starting to make sense and I think that I'm improving as a person. Well, I hope I am.

Whatever happens next, I think that I'll be ready.

Tired as always
I cannot get any sleep
I feel like dreaming

She walks in the light,
Such a strange beauty,
Eyes like the moon,
A smile like the sun.

Bathed in golden light,
I see no answer,
She is a mystery,
I cannot complete.

That's all I can figure out as usual.

San Francisco was fun, but it's nice to be home. It's really hard to not check the scores for the Euro cup. It's 3:00 am and all I want to do is drive somewhere, but I still have no idea where I'm going. Life is weird, but it's nice to have fun.

Goodnight

I sat down on the mountainside and listened for the first time. There was no sound, just silence. Yet everything was around me. I was aware. I had a place in this world, but it never amounted to anything. Yet out here, I am presence. I am universal, I am everything, and nothing.

I finished the Wheelman. It's really good. I can't wait to read the blonde.

There were two Georges who were important to me in my formative years. One was George Harrison, the other George Carlin. While I never knew either, they always felt like guides to me and shaped who I am today. It's the closest I would ever come to the cult of celebrity, and now life has taken the greatest comedian ever. George Carlin is dead. Emotions are confusing enough, and yet here I am sad as ever. I mean, I've never met this man and yet I'm heartbroken. His comedy changed my life and now both Georges are gone.

I'll miss ya George. I hate to have regrets, but not seeing when I had the chance is now one of them.

R.I.P. George C and George H. I never knew either of you, but there is a place in my heart for you.

I've lost my idols.